Women work at home for different reasons. Some choose to work at home because of the freedom & flexibility it gives them. Some choose to work at home because they want to be their own boss. And some choose to work at home because a job outside the home takes them away from their family. Those in this last category often call themselves WAHMs.

     Since I’ve been a stay-at-home mom, I’ve always had lots of jobs to help pay for the “extras” in our family. Nothing was ever really long term, just some freelance work here and there, usually where the kids could help me out. My children were always the priority. But as my kids continued to grow and become more independent, I found that I had more free time to pursue a career of sorts. I didn’t want to work outside the home, because I am a firm believer that a mom still needs to be available for her kids - even, no ESPECIALLY, when they are teens. So I found my niche and started working toward establishing myself in the field of writing, working from the computer in my parlor.

     But I found that while I pursue this new career, I need to be careful that I don’t neglect my primary job - being a wife and mother. Many days I have found myself at the computer until late at night while my husband and kids were off taking care of themselves. It really was an easy trap to fall into. I no longer had a toddler to pull at my pant leg or to climb up into my lap while I was working. And my famliy was really good about it. So it was easy to go back to the computer after supper and work well into the night. But one day, as I was typing away, I had a sudden realization. They were moving around all about me and I was not a part of the group setting. They were talking to each other and asking each other for help. Sometimes they’d throw in a word or two to me, just to hear me answer “Just a minute, I’m busy right now...”. It hit me then - “Busy? Too busy for them?” Why my whole reason for working at home was to be able to “be there” for my kids.

     Now that I had this sudden insight - I needed to regroup. I took a good long look at the way our family life had changed since I began working from home. I found that my projects were consuming my life. That needed to change. It is so easy to get caught up in your vocation when you work at home, especially if you don’t have an actual office. Your work is always “there” staring at you! I recognized that I had to set some boundries so I didn’t lose sight of my real reasons for working at home.

     I took a day and came up with a tentative schedule. With kids of any age you need to be flexible, so I’m not dogmatic about it. I wrote down all my different responsibilities that I need to get done during a given day, including business obligations and deadlines, household duties, and a little free time for myself when everyone is gone. I switched and swapped and juggled them all over the place until I came up with a tentative schedule for a normal week. Each day I look at the schedule and see what is slotted for the day. I do the time-senstive and important duties first, leaving the odds and ends until later in the day. I try to be done with all my projects by the time school is out, and if it is not done - well, it will just have to wait until next time - well most of the time (on one’s perfect!).

     Many times we forget that our teenagers need us to be available for them. Being constantly busy sends a message to our teens that other things are more important to us than they are. If we are too absorbed in our work, even while we are home, we will miss valuable opportunities for communication and relationship building. Teens seem to want to talk at the oddest times and if we aren’t able to grasp the moment as it arises, we might not get another opportunity for a long time. 

     Children need thier mom no matter what the age. Even if they seem all grown up on the outside, they still need their parents to show an interest in and be a part of their lives. If you are like me, a stay-at-home mom who has taken on a new career as a work-at-home mom, let’s not forget our true vision for being a WAHM - putting our families first.